I always wondered about the meaning of this word; a memory recalls having referred to the dictionary once which says “a conclusion.” Well, to begin writing about a conclusion is a conclusion in itself. Words are less, as conclusions are more about feelings. It’s like a pain triggered all the time & once it triggers off, it’s gone. Gone into the eternal abysmal thing called life. Having conquered one such memory, came a conclusion. Such conclusions just pop up, they are deep within but refuse to come to the surface. And when they finally appear, they just disappear. That’s the paradox of closures. Everything disappears with the conclusion.
It’s like the life of a fly (As in the story ‘The Fly’ by Katherine Mansefield) which when repeatedly is drenched into the ink pot it refuses to give up. But by the time one last final blow comes upon, it dies & so does the memory. The process however is like purgation, catharsis precisely to speak theatrically! After all, it is about letting go of an emotion, a person or a feeling. It’s bothering you, letting you down for the memory in itself promised something different.
A want, a need – couldn’t differentiate them both , but when this Closure appeared, everything was a void, for nothing was ever a want or a need. In this revelation,nothing clarifies however, but it just disappears. There is a possibility that the pain might strike you here & there in the future but it will never be as painful. It is because, with every closure you are a step closer to the final blow of Closure, which is The End.
Appreciate life, at such times. Because in such an awakening, lies so many beautiful experiences you were just letting go off. Simply because you enjoyed the troubled state. You enjoyed the pain, knowing it has nothing to offer you, except greater pain! When in the process of closure, the things all around will appear extremely beautiful & will seem one with you. Moreover you come closer to those people & things you avoided in the process of wanting something, that is not meant to be.
Keep a tab of these closures, experience life full swing , the same way as you did before. Cleansing as I referred is therapeutic ,not only inwards but in everything you deal with. Merely cleaning the messed up desktop could give immense confidence & clarity. Try it to believe it. Closure is a simple way of coming a step closer to yourself & shredding off the things weighing you down. Also, do not bother this closure too much, because one day it ought to give you the Final Blow! And that would cease everything.
