There are times in our life we feel so stuck, not with others but with our own selves. Like being in the midst of a maze never being able to find a way out. Some situations then lead to spontaneous depression & thoughts that spiral in no time. It is for those days that having a mentor becomes a mandate. But why look anywhere else when you can be your own mentor in self soothing.
There are days when we observe ourselves & hate how we respond/ react to certain situation. We hate the fact that these situations never cease. But one of the reasons we know they never do, is that we have not changed. On such days when you become your own enemy, becaus eof repeat lessons, reaching out to friends also becomes a task. So we keep avoiding our solution & the spiral of thoughts soon becomes a whirlpool. You just get used to grinding your teeth within. So if you are on this boat, use these techniques of changing your mind & life parallel.
- Pick a diary – You need to write this down first.
- Critique – Our own inner criticism is not a bad thing, it gives you a chance to be a inner coach. Observe yourself in different situations objectively. As if you are being watched by someone else. That is the first step of metacognition. Looking inwards, to ask yourself what triggered a certain response in you, why these responses always seem to repeat, what lesson have we still not learnt? If you could answer all 3 you have already written the first steps to the solution to your problem.
- Overwhelm – Now that you see all things on a paper, know that it will overwhelm you. Your negatives are not just bad choices they are a reflection of your fears. Fear brings forth poor energy. So instead of getting overwhelmed now, think of what you can write under – 3 things to change that energy. Imagine it as though if you were given a second chance how would you respond/ react to the same problem. Once you write the three things, you have already chunked it down. So now overwhelmed emotions turn to actionable things to do.
- Mind Visualisation – Next you need to imagine yourself in a picture which comes to your mind when you change the energy within. Bask in that energy in your mind. Feel exactly how your face would look if you react another way. Use all your 5 senses to experience what it feel when your energy has changed. This practice will help you attract clarity & purpose. Since this visualisation is appealing, it will give you a reason to create opportunities to become this version.
- Become – Because you trained your mind in step 1 to 4 to respond/ react a certain way to your own failing, you will by now have created a sub conscious image of the version you want to be. This subconscious being is what you are seeking as you have just rewired your mind to look only for the better self. A change in your approach to yourself will shift the biochemistry within & brings forth a positive hormone.
That’s how you soothe yourself from spiralling madness in thoughts to a composed self. Metacognition therefore is considered as a greater tool than empathy by neuroscientists. It helps you develop better decision making, fewer repeated mistakes & empowers you with more emotional control.